The Muslimah’s Soft Life of Tawakkul

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Reclaiming Your Softness Through Tawakkul

You want to be soft, gentle, and graceful.

You want to feel secure, loved, valued, protected, and well-provided for.

Sis, you already are.

You just don’t fully see it yet.

The journey to stepping into your feminine nature starts with actively trusting Allah ‎_{سبحانه وتعالى} by recognizing that you are already cared for and that your ultimate Provider is Allah _ﷻ. The world around us has pushed us into unnatural roles and expectations, but with tawakkul, you can reclaim (or discover) your softness without fear.

What Is Tawakkul?

Tawakkul is the state of the heart when it truly relies on Allah _ﷻ in seeking the good it desires and repelling harm in matters of both deen and dunya. It’s also a state of confidence in what Allah _ﷻ possesses while relinquishing hope in what people have.

This state of reliance is liberating because it reminds you that your needs and outcomes rest with the One who controls everything and doesn’t cause harm in the slightest.

The Pressure of Trying to Do It All

Today, women face immense pressure to be everything at once. Society expects women to:

• Outshine in their careers, pursue financial independence, and be seen as self-sufficient while still excelling as primary caregivers.

• Be nurturing and supportive, shouldering the bulk of family and household responsibilities without asking for help.

• Maintain an ideal physical appearance and health while managing a household.

• Always be emotionally available for others while suppressing their own struggles.

This creates an impossible standard, leaving women feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. The reality is, the expectations set by this dunya are far more demanding than those set by Allah ‎سبحانه وتعالى. (🙄 The audacity.)

These expectations clash with the simplicity of living according to Allah’s _ﷻ guidance. Islam teaches us to focus on what truly matters: fulfilling our obligations to Allah _ﷻ and embracing our roles without unnecessary burden. In Islam, women are not expected to be superheroes juggling every aspect of life without faltering. Instead, Allah ‎_{سبحانه وتعالى} has set standards that align with your natural fitrah and protect your dignity, honor, and well-being.

While striving for financial independence is empowering, the pressure to perform often stems from fear—fear of not having enough, fear of mistreatment, or fear of relying on others.

While these fears are valid, they come from forgetting the one truth that simplifies everything: your provision comes from Allah _ﷻ—not your husband, not yourself, not the people around you.

The Impact of Societal Expectations on Women’s Health

One of the most alarming outcomes of these pressures is the toll they take on women’s mental and physical health. Women are being diagnosed with stress-related illnesses and burnout at unprecedented rates. The constant push to “do more” is draining, leaving little room for worship, rest, or self-care.

Islam doesn’t demand perfection—it asks for sincere effort and reliance on Allah _ﷻ.

Why Have Tawakkul?

Tawakkul isn’t just a spiritual concept—it’s a transformative state of mind and heart that impacts every aspect of your life. Our Lord tells us to trust Him repeatedly in the Qur’an and provides countless examples of believers having tawakkul throughout history.

Striving for tawakkul helps you:

• Become a better Muslim, as Allah loves those who rely on Him.

• Overcome the whispers and temptations of Shaytan.

• Reduce stress, fear, and anxiety.

• Strengthen your ability to give dawah.

• Discover meaningful projects that align with your deen and purpose.

When you anchor your life in tawakkul, you align yourself with the love and support of Allah ‎_{سبحانه وتعالى}, which brings serenity, strength, and clarity.

Simplify Life for Your Feminine Nature to Thrive

Modern life, with its fast pace and constant noise, often pulls us away from our natural rhythms as it glorifies the hustle and rewards overworking. However, Islam values simplicity and balance. When you shift your focus to the expectations of Allah ‎_{سبحانه وتعالى}, you’ll find that life flows with ease.

To truly step into your softness:

• Set your priorities: Focus on what aligns with your ultimate goal—pleasing Allah _ﷻ and attaining Jannah.

• Declutter your routines: You most likely don’t need more skincare products (use the ones you have before buying more!). You don’t need things because they’re cute. You don’t need a packed schedule and to do list in which you frantically try to check every box.

  Focus on meaningful tasks that move you forward and give yourself space to breathe and room to grow.

  Remove the clutter. Reduce the noise.

• Create space for barakah: Invest time in salah, dhikr, and reading and reciting the Qur’an. The time spent with Allah _ﷻ never diminishes your ability to get things done; rather, it brings clarity and ease. It’s time well spent, and Allah _ﷻ helps you make up for it.

• Let go of perfectionism: You don’t need to have all the answers or have everything figured out. In fact, you never will. Saying “I don’t know” when you don’t will show you what freedom really feels like. You won’t always see the big picture. Trust that Allah _ﷻ will reveal what you need to know at the right time.

• Accept that life will always have challenges: Ease comes after hardship, and hardship comes after ease—it’s the nature of this dunya. But with tawakkul, you’ll find the strength and clarity to navigate these ups and downs.

How to Work Towards Tawakkul

Building tawakkul takes effort and intention. Here’s how you can begin:

1. Know Allah ‎سبحانه وتعالى.
   You can’t trust someone you don’t know. Learn about Allah _ﷻ through His Names and Attributes, and recognize His presence in your daily life.

   • Study Allah’s Names and reflect on how they manifest in your life, both past and present.

   • Talk to Allah _ﷻ often—turn your thoughts and worries into conversations with Him. (Read my blog post on replacing journaling with talking to Allah to understand what I mean by this.)

2. Read the Qur’an with Reflection.
   Be confident in what Allah _ﷻ says about Himself in the Qur’an. Reflect on the verses where He assures, swears by, and encourages His servants. Join platforms like Quran Reflect to make this a consistent habit. (Follow me!)

3. Take the Means and Measures.
   Pray for the impossible but take steps toward what’s within your reach. Trust Allah _ﷻ to complete what you cannot.

4. Make Dua Regularly.
   Dua is your lifeline. It’s the bridge between your needs and Allah’s infinite mercy. Some of my go to’s are:

   • Hasbiyallahu wa ni’mal wakeel (Allah is sufficient for me, and He is the best Disposer of Affairs).

   • La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah (There is no power or might except with Allah).

   • Rabbi inni lima anzalta ilayya min khayrin faqeer (My Lord, indeed I am in need of whatever good You send down to me).

   • Astaghfirullah (I seek forgiveness from Allah).

   • A’udhu billahi sami’ al-‘alim min ash-shaytan ir-rajim (I seek refuge in Allah, the All-Hearing, the All-Knowing, from the accursed Shaytan).

Trust Allah and Surrender the Burden

When you give your trust, heart, and efforts to Allah, life begins to flow naturally. That doesn’t mean it will always be easy—this life is inherently filled with tests—but Allah _ﷻ provides the strength, clarity, and guidance you need, especially in ways that honor your feminine nature.

Tawakkul means recognizing that you don’t have to meet every expectation. You don’t have to do it all. In fact, you were never meant to. Allah _ﷻ has not created us to carry burdens that are too heavy. It’s in our nature to nurture and sometimes, take on burdens that aren’t ours to carry.

Which is why Allah _ﷻ reminds us:

Learn to give support, not solutions. You don’t have to fix everything or everyone. Trust that Allah _ﷻ is the ultimate Disposer of Affairs and the one who brings clarity and resolution to every problem.

So, let go of the weight of trying to meet societal standards. Instead, embrace the standards of Islam, which prioritize your well-being, family, and relationship with Allah _ﷻ above all else.

Rewards for a Person of Tawakkul

The rewards of tawakkul are immense:

• Allah’s love and pleasure.

• Serenity, peace, and calmness.

• Strength and courage to overcome trials.

• Triumph over Shaytan’s whispers.

• Success in your goals and abundant provision.

• Jannah.

When to Seek Extra Tawakkul

Tawakkul is essential in every moment of life, but especially in these situations:

• When leaving your home.

• During distress and hardship.

• When people turn away from you.

• When you turn away from people for the sake of Allah.

• When combating sins.

• When faced with bad news.

Trust Allah, Embrace Your Nature

Tawakkul is an active state of confidence in your Lord’s provision and love for you. Give your best because Allah _ﷻ only gives you His best. It allows you to let go of control and open yourself to the blessings Allah _ﷻ has in store for you.

Let your heart rest in the knowledge that you are already loved, valued, and provided for by the One who possesses everything and knows what’s best for you.

Surrender control, trust Allah, and watch your life transform.

As-salamu alaikum, until next time, in sha Allah

—Khalisa