- The Niyyah Journal
- Posts
- Living in the End: Becoming the Woman You Envision Today
Living in the End: Becoming the Woman You Envision Today
Khalisa
October 31, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 11 minutes
She’s Your Fitrah Series Recap:
Week 1 — We asked big duas, determined where our starting point is, and where we truly want to be. Week 5 — We looked at how Allah ﷻ defines success |
Remember to stay in order and continue to apply the lessons from the previous weeks. |
﷽
In week 3, I briefly touched on the idea of living in the end; embodying the woman you’re praying to become before your duas arrive. This week, we’re going deeper into that.
To align with our natural feminine identity that Allah ﷻ designed us with, we must understand that we are ultimately a collection of beliefs and actions. What we do most often reflects what we truly believe, not what we claim to believe.
The heart commands the limbs, so our heart determines what we repeatedly do and that stems from what we repeatedly believe to be true for ourselves. If we want to live as our dream self, we have to start by changing our beliefs.
“Indeed, in the body there is a piece of flesh; if it is sound, the whole body is sound, and if it is corrupt, the whole body is corrupt. Truly, it is the heart.”
The Power of Belief
Everyone loves to start with habits, mostly because they’re outward and visible. But transformation begins in your beliefs, and they can’t be seen. They’re felt.
Your thoughts and feelings are the quiet architects behind your behavior. That’s why living in the end doesn’t come from forcing discipline; it comes from aligning your internal state with what you want to manifest outwardly.
If you feel like you’re pretending to be someone better than who you are, know that that’s just a belief. You don’t need to deserve to be the woman you dream of becoming, you only need to believe you are capable of being her.
When you make dua for anything, be certain that Allah ﷻ is fully capable of helping you become the kind of woman who:
would receive what she asks for because she’s capable of handling it without collapsing into her ego, and
is capable of achieving the big dua because her beliefs and actions are aligned with Islam and His pleasure.
You don’t have to wait to become her; she is someone you choose.
Simplify Your Approach to Success
People often overcomplicate transformation because they think success must be complicated. It isn’t. It’s not easy, but it’s simple.
Now that we’ve defined success as Allah ﷻ defines it, ask yourself: What would guarantee failure?
You listed all your roles in week 1 so in your notebook, for each role, ask: What would naturally lead to not accomplishing my desired outcome?
Once you identify the traps that guarantee failure, success becomes much simpler. You only have to avoid those traps and remain steadfast upon what Allah ﷻ has already outlined as success.
“Indeed, the most successful of you is the one who purifies it (the soul), and the most failed is the one who corrupts it.”
Finding the Bottleneck
Look back at your self-assessment from week 1. What area of your life is holding everything else back?
Identify that bottleneck, then work to remove the resistance in that area. True flow doesn’t come from doing more. It comes from removing what constricts you.
“And whoever fears Allah — He will make for him a way out and provide for him from where he does not expect.”
When you act from taqwa, Allah ﷻ opens doors that action alone never could.
Remember, the simplest answer is typically the best one.
Shift How You Speak to Yourself
If you struggle with a harsh inner critic or perfectionism, soften your self-talk. Do not talk down to yourself or negatively about yourself because you are a servant of Allah ﷻ.
“And [there is a share for] those who came after them, saying, ‘Our Lord, forgive us and our brothers who preceded us in faith and put not in our hearts [any] resentment toward those who have believed. Our Lord, indeed You are Kind and Merciful.’”
Appreciate what mistakes and imperfections give you — growth, understanding, wisdom, and closeness with Allah ﷻ if you allow yourself to see them as necessary parts of life. We shouldn’t dismiss or rationalize them, but we should normalize them so that we don’t fall into shame.
Shame weighs and slows you down.
Acknowledge your mistakes. Repent for them. Learn from them. And move on.
“All the children of Adam are sinners, and the best of sinners are those who repent.”
Use language that aligns with mercy, gratitude, and abundance:
“I’m a good person and I often make mistakes.”
“I’m a beginner and each day I get better.”
“Every day, I am stepping into myself with more confidence and clarity.”
Don’t Decide While Emotional
When you feel urgency, fear, or stress, don’t make decisions. Emotions are like waves — they rise, they pass. Wait for the calm, then act.
Your emotions are tied to your beliefs.
“Be deliberate in decision and seek calmness in demeanor.”
You’ll notice that when you act from peace, things fall into place faster. Alignment is speed only because of its lack of resistance.
The Habits That Align You with Her
Plan at Night — Begin with Maghrib
The Islamic day begins at Maghrib, not Fajr. Our planning should too.
Planning the next day at night allows you to wake up already anchored. It removes decision fatigue and honors the natural rhythm Allah built into time.
“And it is He who made the night and the day in succession for whoever desires to remember or desires gratitude.”
Anchor Your Day with Dhikr
Morning and evening adhkar are the most powerful anchors for your nervous system and soul. Add them to your morning and night routines for simplicity.
They align your heart with His command and when you align with His command, you align with success itself.
“And remember your Lord within yourself in humility and in fear, without being apparent in speech — in the mornings and evenings.”
“So remember Me; I will remember you.”
Regulate Your Nervous System
You cannot align with your fitrah if your body feels unsafe. You must first feel safe with Allah ﷻ in order to surrender.
Allow your body to trust you through how you treat it.
-When you follow the commands of Allah and the guidance of the Qur’an, you are doing what’s best for yourself and therefore showing your body that you care.
-When you keep your promises to yourself, you show your body you are trustworthy.
-When you avoid toxic environments and people unwilling to reconcile, you teach your body that its safety is a priority.
-When you do what’s right even when no one sees, you prove to your body that you are who you say you are.
“Whatever good you do is for yourselves.”
“And keep your oaths.”
“It is He who sent down tranquility into the hearts of the believers that they would increase in faith along with their faith.”
Prioritize Obligations First
When your energy runs low, remember: doing the bare minimum/ fulfilling your fard, is enough.
Feeding your children, maintaining a kind home, praying your salah, remembering Allah throughout the day, is success.
“My servant does not draw near to Me with anything more beloved to Me than what I have made obligatory upon him.”
Design Your Dream Self Strategically
This isn’t toxic positivity. It’s strategic submission. You’re not creating a “new” self (though it may feel like it) you’re uncovering the woman Allah ﷻ already designed.
The Islamic Muslimah identity is already defined, you’re just aligning with it.
Focus on who you want to be, not what you want to have, because your akhlaq (character) will naturally attract the rest.
Stay firm and certain by repelling doubts with Allah’s promises. Hold the vision, not the doubt.
“And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah.”
“Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves.”
Living in Alignment and Ease
When you embody your Islamic identity, something shifts.
A quiet, elevated growth. A deepened, graceful beauty. A flow with life.
“Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah — unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts find rest.”
Gratitude, love, patience, and certainty become states you live in and operate from.
If you do the heart work, the only difference between you and your dream self is consistency. She’s not far away. She’s who you are when you keep showing up as her. When you choose her, again and again.
So be her today. Do what she would do today. And watch how Allah ﷻ brings the rest together for you.
Because seriously, think about it.
When you trust Him, and live from that trust, tightly holding onto His words and promises, fulfilling His commands to the best of your ability each day, refining your character so it pleases Him, and prioritizing His right to be worshipped and relied upon alone… what won’t He give you?
“Whoever shows enmity to a friend of Mine, I have declared war upon him.
My servant does not draw near to Me with anything more beloved to Me than what I have made obligatory upon him.
And My servant continues to draw near to Me with voluntary deeds until I love him.
When I love him, I become his hearing with which he hears, his seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes, and his foot with which he walks.
Were he to ask of Me, I would surely give him; and were he to seek refuge in Me, I would surely protect him.”
Living in the end is a form of radical tawakkul. It’s saying, “I trust that Allah’s promise is so real that I’m willing to live by it.”
Alignment is peace so assalamu alaikum, enjoy your week.
With love and dua,
—Khalisa
“And whoever relies upon Allah — then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose.”
“And as for those who believed and did righteous deeds, the Most Merciful will grant them affection.”
Your dream self isn’t a fairytale. She’s your fitrah.
Learn more about my private coaching program here.